Three Months

My dear Kyan:

Yesterday you were Three months old. I would have written this post yesterday, but you were too busy screaming into my ear for me to be able to sit down and write.

You have come a long way since we brought you home. You now smile and laugh. You also know how to stick out your lower lip so we can more easily tell when you are pissed off, which is more often now. Your begining to learn how to grasp things-Namely: My hair, your hair, my nosering, or my nipple when you are nursing.

You are starting to sit up, though not on your own-You are growing more accustomed to your Bumbo seat. You sit there as if that is your throne, and you are just waiting for some little girl babies in togas to come along and feed you grapes...not that you could EAT grapes, yet....

We make sure to give you tummy time each day, which means we lay you on your stomach and cheer you on as you whine miserably about the impossibility of trying to lift your head up for such an extended period of time. Eventually, you just give up and start blowing snots all over your playmat.

You recently learned "cause and effect". When we feed you a bottle in the morning and take it out of your mouth to burp you, you scream as if the world were a truly horrible place and no injustice is greater than that nipple being removed from your piehole. Just to be sure we get the point, you will turn your head and mouth TOWARDS my or your father's ear so you can scream DIRECTLY into it-Just in case we didn't realize how pissed you were. As soon as you are back in position for your bottle, you immediatly calm down, because you know you are about to get the bottle back.

You frequenly go from smiling and giggly to a pouty lower lip or full out crying, leading your father and I to believe that you may be bi-polar. Luckily, we are prepared for this. By the time you are old enough to swallow pills, you will be so medicated as to make Courtney Love look normal. If meds don't work, I plan on locking you in a room while I drink full bottles of vodka.

We recently transitioned you to your crib in your own room so that your sleep toots and morning poop grunts do not wake us up-Which is not to say we don't love you, just that you are the world's loudest pooper, and Mommy and Daddy prefer sleep over the sounds brought forth from your butt cheeks.

All in all, it has been a fairly easy three months...Which is why I am sure you will shortly turn into the anti-christ....Just, ya know, to keep us on our toes....

Love,
Mama